I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
