gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
