11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
