am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
