I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize
