i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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