Its about making memories worth repressing
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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