Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Two words: blizzard sex
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize