we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
