Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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