I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
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