She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
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