last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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