i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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