My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
