But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
my shit smells like andre
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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