i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Never let your siblings swipe right.
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