I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
