and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
