Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
