The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
