Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
