So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
