Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
