So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
