Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
