Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
