For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
