so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
