is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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