I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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