Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
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