So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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