he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
