She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
