I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
