fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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