new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
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