I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
