I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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