just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
