Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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