you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Girls should come with a carfax report
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
