Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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