Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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