my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
