Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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