As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Randomize
