I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize