i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
When are your genitals available?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize