so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
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