I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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